Top Ten: things to say when you want to break up but make her be the a**hole

Have you ever been in a relationship with a chick and you honestly don’t even know how it progressed this far?

Even though getting laid consistently is great – sometimes you wake up _{^{(one day)}} and realize “what the ___ am I doing with this person?”… “Why is there a pink toothbrush and tampons in my bathroom?”

Might sound silly but sh*t happens and you know ghosting this person is not really an option.

Here are some suggestion on how to slow your roll and not be the bad guy.

1. I got downsized from my job with no severance.
2. I just booked a trip to Vegas with all my boyz.
3. Saturday is for the boys…
4. I’m thinking about quitting my job and going back to school to study female psychology
5. When’s the last time you got tested for STD’s?
6. I write this great article about benevolent sexism. I think we should totally start going halfzies on things so I’m not objectivizing you.
7. I think I’m starting to loose my hair like my father.
8. I’m give up sex for lent and focus on the “US” in Jesus.
9. Have you every thought about doing anal?
10. Do you think your friend Jenn would ever want to join us?